Update

I'm starting a totally different post for this one. Even though it's still an update, like my previous post, I have a totally different tone and emotion right now and I wouldn't do the jaunty, cheerful mood of my previous post justice at the moment. So, this is probably going to be more of a depressing/ranting post and if that bothers you I suggest you move on. This is my blog, after all. ;)

To ruin the surprise from my last post, I decided to stay in South Dakota instead of going back to California with my car. My dad was planning on leaving before we had originally planned and I wasn't ready to leave my friends yet. My dad and I had dinner one night, we ended up talking about college, and I decided to take some more classes while I was here. After that decision, I was talking to my mother about finances and decided to find out how much debt I have and how much college was going to cost me so I could come up with a "plan of attack" for that bug-eyed monster. My debt isn't incredible, about $2,000 between two cards and then another card with around $8,000. So, $10,000 total, but in the grand scheme of things that shouldn't take too long to get rid of, as long as I play my cards right and be smart about it. Well, I allowed myself to get into a bit of a frenzy about that (talking to collectors and whatnot can get anybody worked up) and in my panic-induced stupor, I joined the army.

That is a big, scary list of chain reactions. I don't regret my decision to join the army... I have become less impressed with the list of benefits that they boast, but I don't regret my decision. I did just join the Reserves, so it's not like I'm going to be shipped off to Iraq (anytime soon, if ever) and I will learn a lot of skills and gain a lot of qualities that I didn't have before. Discipline, for example, and combatives, and weapons training, and countless other things they can teach you. On top of that, there is pay, they pay for college, and there are a million benefits after the army. Military discounts, health discounts, etc, etc.

The only problem with all of this is I still feel depressed. After I make a decision, whether it's the right one or not, I usually feel instantly relieved, and there isn't any relief this time. It makes me nervous, like I'm forgetting something important. It could possibly be because army or no army, there isn't any relief from the previous issues. Finances. My dad's bright idea to get my college bill paid of was to talk to my grandparents, which apparently meant, I was supposed to talk to my grandparents. That... that was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. They gave me money when I first started as a gift, to help me with college expenses. Well, after I got sick and failed classes, I felt so ashamed of myself that I didn't want to tell them that I had failed, I didn't want them to be disappointed in me. Having to go back and apologize for that, still hear them be disappointed, and then ask for money about broke me.

So, that takes care of my previous college bill, but that doesn't do anything for this semester. I'll still have to pay for classes this semester. I'm hoping that the army will pay for them, but since I'm not going to basic training till next summer, I'm not sure if they will. It's something I'll have to talk about with the counselors. I'm going to Sioux Falls tomorrow to take the physical and the aptitude test. I've always done excellently on tests, so I'm not worried about that at all. But after that I'll hopefully be able to get some clearer answers on the college issue. I know they pay for it, either as a refund of student loans or a direct payment to the school, but I'm not sure how the situation will pan out for this year.

Then on top of the current college costs, I still have that 10 grand in debt wracking up interest. I'll get a job when I go back to Brookings, of course. So, if I apply all my earnings to that debt I should be able to take care of it pretty quickly. If I take part time classes and work full time... minimum wage is $6.50 (at the worst), so 6.50*40 = 260. Most places pay bi-weekly, so each paycheck would be $520, take out 60 for taxes and you have $480 every two weeks, or $960 a month. So, I could have that debt paid off in around 11 months just with a minimum wage job. Of course, that's not counting food and rent and whatnot, so I'm probably looking around two years, but that's not a big deal either. I think I can take out student loans while the army is paying for my tuition as well, so the army could, in theory, pay off that debt themselves. Forgive me if none of this paragraph makes sense. It's kind of how my thought process works, so I understand it, but you might not.

In conclusion, I suppose, I shouldn't freak myself out over this, but I've been ignoring it all for the past six months and it's all falling on me at once. I don't think it'll be a huge problem. Obviously, it'll be difficult to get it taken care of, but that's life. I can't expect something for nothing. The next thing I need to worry about is where the hell I'm gonna find a decent man! Lol, just kidding. Everyone knows I'm going to wind up an old and withered cat lady. ;)